This time of year is full of repeated, annoying messages on Gratitude and Giving Thanks for our many blessings. We read articles, listen to podcasts and watch movies inspiring gratitude. And most people (not you, of course) may perhaps comment about all of their blessings.

But not you. We might play along for a second, saying, ‘Oh Yeah… I am grateful..’ We do that to pretend we are onboard, but we wouldn’t want to linger there very long, or we might be affected by such positive bologna. True to form, as a Grump, we willingly let our minds jump to our chronic complaints and frustrations. The internal resistance builds, and we begin to resent all those fake-smiling Cheergivers and messages of gratitude.

Well, it’s time we Grumps got our Holiday back under control. Aren’t you tired of all that gratitude and appreciation stuff? Instead, this Thanksgiving, why don’t we just dig in deeply to fully experience the power of being the Complete Grump? We must start complaining and blaming without embarrassment and maximize our despair to spread some of that misery to others!

The Power of The Grump!

Everyone is always heralding the value of being grateful. Especially in today’s climate, it seems time we start to honor the trends of our leadership and the great values they promote! So here, just in time for Grumpsgiving, are all the great benefits we get from joining the herd of Grumps.

The More We Grumps Complain & Blame, The More We Realize We Are Always Right:

Do you need a boost for that weak ego? Are you feeling lost because everything hasn’t come to you the way you want it? We can change that right now.

Here’s the answer: Double down on Grumpville! Get on board with the blame and complain game, and soon, you will have an over-inflated and NEVER-wrong ego. Hone in on noticing only the errors and mistakes of anyone who disagrees with you, and then start sharing your complaints. Do so with a powerful, angry voice as if you are absolutely sure of your correctness. No one else will have room to be correct, and you will see that everyone else is an idiot (unless they agree with you!). The weaker you feel your ego is, you may have to pick it up a bit. Watch some YouTube of some great grumps, and practice what they do. It’s a great jump start, feeding your mind with professional-level complaints.

Grump Secret Weapon #1:

We Are Never Responsible for Our Struggles Because It’s Your Fault! It’s a beautiful thing! Why take responsibility for your mistakes? All that responsibility stuff is overrated and is built on the premise that we want to grow, evolve and improve. Or worse yet, we want to be happy and feel good. Forget that foolishness!

So, notice how you start to feel if you take responsibility for nothing. Your ego will begin to inflate, and while completely filled with ‘hot air,’ it is nonetheless a Big Ego. And better to have that, I am confident, than a weak ego.

Grump Secret Weapon #2:

You Always Get to Be the Victim! Here’s another fantastic benefit from complaining and blaming. You are always the poor, poor victim of all those other bad people in the world. If someone tries to hold you accountable, you make a four-year-old pout and blame someone else.

When in doubt around others, the true Grump digs deeper into this victim role. For those Grump wannabes, who are joining this herd, they will see your pain. They will applaud your tantrums and solidify how terribly victimized you have been. Try to get your best friends on board, so you can all support each other in being the victim. However, you will have to share the mantle sometimes, as every victim needs the spotlight now and then!

You Get to Look and Feel Miserable Often! (That Happiness Thing is Overrated.)

Just ignore all that research on happiness, appreciation, and love. Who needs that stuff anyway? It’s all for those weaklings who can’t take the power of being right all the time. They don’t have the stomach for blaming and complaining, and for some odd reason, they want to smile more than frown. Again, simpletons who are weak! Show your strength now over this Grumpsgiving by frowning and snarling at others, just for the heck of it. More misery awaits, and you, my friend, have the stomach and strength for it. Test it and find out how much pain you can endure.

Take Baby Steps If You Must!

If you are new to Grump training, I know this is a lot to ask of some of you. Yet, for others, this will feel just right. But remember, if you are tempted to be grateful or kind, GRUMP UP a bit. You can always find something to complain about with your child, spouse, or the food. Or turn on the news; indeed, you can focus on world-class complaining.

Humor Aside: Thanksgiving or Grumpsgiving?

Let’s imagine we have the power, and we do, to choose what we focus on. The Grumps of the world often don’t recognize that they have a choice, even though they do. The same option applies to all of us. Let’s double down on our disinterest in the complaints we hear from others and those that arise in our minds. Instead, let’s focus on repeatedly finding gratitude for something, large or small, in almost every moment. Try it for an hour today, and notice how the rest of the day goes.

We can choose to focus in ways that WILL change our emotional state, and we then get to share that sweetness with those we love and meet. Happy Thanksgiving to ALL (even the Grumps!)